Oh, hey there Taylor Swift.

Perfect.  Hair.

THE RANT

I've spent years pining after curly hair.  Years.  I had a great friend in high school who had beautiful curly hair.  It was dark brown and long, with this perfect mix of ringlet/wave curls that weren't too tight, and never crossed over into wavy frizz.  Every day I told her how much I wanted her hair, and every day she told me how much she wanted straight hair.  My hair, incidentally, while moderately thick and healthy, is straight as an arrow.  I would spend HOURS trying to curl my hair.  When I did curl my hair, it looked nice for about two seconds before the curls fell out and left my hair more boring than ever.

When my curly-haired friend got her hair chemically straightened, I wanted to punch her straight in the face.

True story.

Ever since then, I've been searching for the holy grail of turning my hair into beautiful curls.  I had a perm once, and it actually didn't turn out that badly.  I got the body and the wave I wanted, and it was relatively easy to take care of.  However, recently I've become rather averse to using harsh chemicals on my head, and perming solutions are about as nasty as they come.  Additionally, I have neither the skill set nor the patience for using a curling iron.  My arms get tired, and I burn myself badly at least once.  Let me tell you, there's nothing funny about a burn mark on your neck that looks like a hickey, especially when you teach high school students....ok, so it IS funny.  But I always feel like people are secretly judging me, or making lude (and by "lude" I mean "lewd."  Thanks for pointing that spelling error out in the sassiest way possible, husband.) jokes at my expense, because that's probably what I would do.

So, to avoid all that hassle, I've ventured into the wonderful world of no-heat curling techniques.  I was so floored the first time I saw some of these tutorials I almost cried.  Let's list some of my favorites that I have tried and would like to try:

1. The Sock Bun
2. Headband Curls 
3. Rag Curls (which I'm showing you how to do today) 
4. Braiding/twists
5. Foam Roller Curls

Seriously, all you have to do is Google "no-heat curls" and there is a wealth of video how-to's that pop up.  I feel compelled to add that most of these videos are done by bubbly teenage girls who like to hear themselves talk, and blab on about stuff I don't care about. One girl actually answered her friend's phone call in the middle of her tutorial. Another one had a 15 minute intro about why her curl tutorial was awesome.  FIFTEEN MINUTES.  Subsequently, I find myself compulsively sniggering at their teenage-ness;  however, beggars can't be choosers.  And I want curly hair.  So, the above curl types are linked to the least annoying tutorials I could find.  You're welcome.

THE TUTORIAL

Rag curls are about as old fashioned as curls get.  Back in the day (before they invented third-degree-burning irons), women used to use literal strips of rags to tie their hair up and create curls (while walking uphill both ways in knee-deep snow).  In these modern times, we have more convenient options.  Here's what you'll need:

1. Pillow Rollers.  These are made up of a small foam block and a wire, covered with a cloth.  Conair makes a package of 18 rollers for about $8.00.  You can find them at Walgreens and probably Walmart.
2. Water.  If you want to get fancy, water in a misting/spray bottle.  I just use my hands...or the shower.
3. Some sort of leave-in, curl-holding hair product.  I use Garnier Fructis Surf Hair (a "texture paste"), but you can also use mousse as well.
4. A scarf (preferably silk, but cotton will do as well).  The scarf helps hold all your rollers in place while you sleep, as well as keeping the hair in the rollers from getting frizzy on the outside.  Technically, silk works best because hair just slides over the fabric, but I don't own a silk scarf (nor will I probably EVER own one), so I wrapped a plain old cotton scarf around my noggin.  Works like a charm.
5. Possibly a curling iron?.....I know, I KNOW.  This is supposed to be "no-heat."  Unfortunately, I've lost a few of my rollers, so I don't have enough to do my whole head.  I'm left with stragglies that form a sort of weird mullet...well, you'll see soon enough.  You might also need a curling iron if the bottom section of your hair is too short to wrap in the curlers.
6. Bobby pins.  For pinning back curls.  
7. A good sense of humor.  It gets worse before it gets better - you ARE going to look ridiculous as you go through this process.  Don't plan to leave your house.  I honestly can't believe I'm posting some of these picture on the internet...

THE PROCESS

Plain, boring straight hair.  I accentuated the boring with no makeup.  

This is what the "pillow rollers" look like....so you'll be wrapping your hair in tampons, apparently.

You need to start with DAMP hair.  If your hair is too wet, the curl won't dry all the way through and will just fall when you take out the roller.   However, if your hair is too dry, it won't work either.  So.  Damp hair.    I shower, then add a little bit of styling product.  This particular time, I didn't add any product (I don't know why, I just didn't).

Part your hair like you normally would.  Starting at the top of your head,  take a piece of hair and place your curler around the middle of it.  Don't take too big of a chunk of hair (it won't dry overnight), but don't take too small a piece (you'll end up with lots of tiny little ringlets....unless that's what you're going for).  There are two ways you can roll your hair: over the curler or under it.  For simplicity's sake, I just rolled all my hair over the roller.  However, if you want more variety and more natural-looking curls, alternate over and under.  

Taking the end of your hair, wrap it firmly around the roller.  After the end is wrapped up, roll  the rest of your hair up to the top of your scalp, making sure to wrap up the ends into the roll.

Once wrapped up,  bring the ends of the curler together and twist them together.  If you're rolling your hair OVER the curler, bring the ends UP and twist.  If you're rolling your hair UNDER the curler, bring the ends DOWN and twist.  If you don't listen to me, your rollers won't stay in.  You've been warned.

Like I said, start at the top of your head and work your way down, maintaining your natural part until...

...You've rolled up your whole head.  All your hair should be rolled up, unless you're like me and  run out of rollers.  Then you'll be stuck with a mullet, and you'll have to use a hot iron in the morning to curl the rest of your head.  Don't run out of curlers.

Once you've rolled all your hair, it's time for your turban.  I TOLD you you're going to look ridiculous.  Here's your proof.  At this point, it's totally normal for your significant other to make fun of you.  If they tell you you look beautiful, they're lying.    My husband spent a good half hour following me around cracking jokes.  Ignoring the wise-cracks, wrap your head so that all your curlers are under the scarf, tying the scarf securely, but comfortably.  Now, all you have to do is go to bed!

Disclaimer:  Sleeping on these rollers isn't amazingly comfortable, but I've not had any problems falling asleep and staying asleep.  The only problem I've encountered is that if you roll your hair 3+ days in a row, your scalp might get sore from curler pressure points.

 THE MORNING AFTER

Good morning!  Look who's all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed.  Coffee is optional.

Ugh.  Curling iron.  This is the part where you curl whatever leftover pieces you might have missed....and try your darnedest not to burn your neck.

After your harrowing curling iron escapade, you can begin to unwrap your rollers.  Gently  undo the curlers,  this time starting from the bottom of your head and working your way to the top.  

HOLY CURLS, BATMAN!

...more Shirley Temple.

Less Taylor Swift...

Okay, since I'm not really going for the Shirley Temple look, I used bobby pins to pin the curls toward the back of my head.  This whole process is a matter of preference.   Play around with pinning to create the look you want.  I'm still making adjustments.  

By strategically pinning the curls by my face, I create a nice textured wave  instead of ringlet curls.

By bobby pinning curls back in sections, starting with the top of your head, middle and bottom,  you can create  a pretty mass of curls at the back of your head.  Granted, this might look a little up-doish for everyday, but I like it for when I'm feeling fancy.

THE FINISHED PRODUCT

Later that day...

Okay, so this is my hair at about 7 pm.  The curls have DEFINITELY  relaxed...12 hours later.  Remember, I also didn't put in any kind of styling product.  This is more the look I'd like to achieve, and I'm still figuring out how to get this right away.

PROS:

Long-lasting curls (even without hair product)

No-heat 

Fairly easy

Not too uncomfortable to sleep on

Overnight process (less work in the morning)

CONS:

Uber-tight curls

Not super comfortable to sleep on

You look like a total fool while your curls are setting

Overnight process (need to plan ahead)

I like this technique for its simplicity.  While the curl you get is pretty intense, I love how long the curl lasts.  I'm wondering if the curl wouldn't be quite so dramatic if you have longer hair.  That way the weight of the hair might pull the curl down more?   If you try this and have any styling suggestions, please let me know!  

Go get 'em Curly Sue!