Getting old.

I sincerely hope AKF and I are half this cool in 50 years.  

I have been exhibiting signs of elderly-hood as of late and I am simultaneously alarmed and amused.  I realize that those of you who know me (and are older than me) will be rolling your eyes, probably muttering something like, "Kids these days..." (see number 3 on the following list).  However, do keep in mind, it's a humbling experience when you realize that the things your elders have always said you have to look forward to (often with a self-satisfied gleam in their eye) have suddenly become a reality.

Here's what I've noticed - signs you're getting old(er):

1. You have back pain and complain about it often (and sometimes loudly).
2. You start paying religious attention to your bodily functions (you know what I mean).
3. You say stuff like, "Kids these days..." and mean it.
4. You can no longer eat whatever you want without your scale slapping you in the face - hard - at the end of the week.
5. You start drinking decaf coffee.
6. Your joints get stiff when you sit in one position for too long, and you end up having to limp or waddle your way to the kitchen for that decaf coffee.
7. GRAY HAIR.  Holy crap. I found three.
8. You get really into crocheting.

I realize that most of these things could be fixed by yoga, a little cardio, a trip to the salon, and an attitude adjustment.  But just the fact that they're pronounced enough for me to notice is saying something...mainly that I'm getting old.  Okay, fine, older.

Some of you might be taking issue with number 8 on The List, and I would agree with you.  Crocheting, knitting, and sewing are not hobbies for your grandmother anymore.  Crochet is showing up as lacy detail on the collars of shirts or as cut-outs (on the back of shirts), as pretty straps on tank tops, etc.  I've noticed several blankets in places like World Market, Target, and other major stores and I think, "Hey, that's crochet.  I could totally make that!"

Since I am by NO MEANS a crochet expert (I literally taught myself how to crochet by watching YouTube videos), I'll also post a couple really handy videos that were useful to me when I was learning.  If these videos don't do it for you, just hunt around on YouTube until you find something that makes sense to you.  Above all - just try it! And don't be afraid to make mistakes and mutter curse words under your breath as you're ripping out yarn because you realized you started missing stitches.  (That may or may not be experience talking, right there.)

Here are a couple helpful videos, and happy crocheting!

5 Basic Crochet Stitches - Red Heart Yarn

How to Crochet a Hat - Threadbanger

(This was my very first crochet project!)

Monsters and Taylor Swift (Revisited).

 Part 1.

The ghost of tutorials past.

So, remember in one of my earlier posts I was all like, "I totally want hair like Taylor Swift, but can't use a curling iron?"  And then I gave you a tutorial about how to use these little "pillow curlers" that kind of looked like tampons?  And then I kind of just kind of looked like Shirley Temple, and not like Taylor Swift at all?

Well, guess what?  I tried a method using different curlers that is less Shirley Temple and way more Tay-Tay.  I know!  Awesome, right?

So, I'm going to be lazy (since this is a revisitation, after all) and give you the video tutorial that I used to get these curls.  I might have included it in the original no-heat curls post, but here it is again.

And, I sincerely want to apologize for the teenage-ness of this video.  The creator is the quintessential bubbly teenage girl, and I found myself being a total hater while I was watching the video.  Shame on me, especially since I found it really helpful.  BUT, if you find yourself rolling your eyes in the first ten seconds (like I did), skip to 2:54 for the less annoying tutorial.

See?  This is so much better than my crazy Shirley Temple curls.  

Part 2.

Moving On.

So, you know that awkward moment when you run out of bookmarks because you're reading, like, 5 different books, so you start using receipts and bobby pins as bookmarks?  No?  Just me.  Huh.

Well, I'm out of bookmarks, and I ran across this cute little tutorial on... (drumroll, please)... Pinterest.  I know - weird.  There are a ton of other bookmark ideas that involve stealing paint sample cards from places like Home Depot and Menards and such.  But, that would require me to leave the house today, which I'm not really inclined to do.  So I'll use the oodles of cardstock I have instead.

materials.

Plain cardstock and left over scrapbooking paper from my coasters project.

1.  Cardstock or scrapbooking paper
2.  Scissors
3.  Glue
4.  Pencil
5.  Coffee (optional)













procedure.

Starting with a 6x6 piece of paper, fold your paper in half.

Next, take each bottom point of the triangle, and fold it to the top point.

Unfold your triangle.

Fold the top point of your triangle down.

Refold the "wings" of your triangle up to the center point.

Tuck in the point of one wing into the pocket that you've created.

Tuck the other wing into the pocket.

Now it's time to decorate!  If you make a monster, make sure the teeth have
 angled edges so they will fit properly.

Awww, it's a monster...a really dopey monster.

Monsters a bit on the childish side?  Here's a grown up version
 using the scrapbooking paper.

Voila!  It is finished!

Now, get rid of those bobby pins and receipts.  Unfold those dog-ears holding your place.  You now have something better!

Coasters.

So, I have no coffee table.

Wait, no.

I have a coffee table, but it's been commandeered as an entertainment center, currently housing basically every electronic gizmo we have in the house.  Honestly, it was rickety at best when we bought it (but CHEAP), and I'm not really sure if it will be able to withstand its current workload much longer.  The poor thing is sagging sadly in the middle, and we've glued a popsicle stick to the bottom of one of the shelf supports because it snapped in half five minutes after we bought it. (Aaron had the audacity to rest his feet on the bottom shelf).  We really should just put it out of its misery, but I mean, it's doing such an admirable job and I don't want it to feel like Curly's dog from Of Mice and Men.  And who's to say a piece of furniture doesn't have feelings?

Yeah, so, anyway.  I have no coffee table.  So what on God's green earth possessed me to make coasters when I have no functional coffee table?  Because I could.  That's why.

And I have to say, they're pretty cool.

Mod Podge Coasters

To clarify, it is "mod podge," NOT "modge podge," which I may or may not have said all the time until I actually went to buy mod podge today and read the label.  Oops.

Materials:

Sprecher root beer and Chairman Bob
drop cloth are highly recommended, but not required.

1. Ceramic tiles:  I got mine from Menards for $.11 a piece.  This made Aaron very happy - Menards and a cheap craft to keep me happy.  If you are not blessed from above with a Menards, try Home Depot or the like.
2. Mod podge:  There are a variety of finishes available.  I chose the glossy finish.  You can find this in any craft store.
3. Sponge brush or mod podge brush from Michaels.
4. Scrapbooking paper:  I used s.e.i. brand "Field Notes" 6x6 paper pad which I purchased from Hobby Lobby.  Seriously, there are so many paper options out there.  You should not have trouble finding patterns you love.  I really loved the mix of this particular paper pad.
5. Felt with an adhesive back:   Purchased at Michaels (you could also just hot glue felt to the back of the coasters).  If I had been thinking more clearly, I would have used cork instead of felt, but I guess waste not...and also felt was cheaper.
6. Acrylic clear coat spray:  Again, these are available in many finishes - I chose glossy.  Available at craft stores or probably Home Depot and Menards.  In any case, look for it in the paint aisle.
7. Scissors
8. Pencil
9. Ruler or any straight edge

The Process:

I knew nothing - NOTHING, not even the correct pronunciation - about mod podge before this project, other than it existed.  I don't think it involves much in the way of fancy technique, and the Pinterest post that this idea came from made it seem pretty simple, which, for the most part it is.

step 1.  Take one of your tiles and trace it onto the back of one of your pieces of paper so you have a rough estimate of the size of your tile.  You are going to use this first piece as a template for tracing your other paper pieces.

This is important:  You want your piece of paper to be SMALLER than the actual tile.  You should have a little bit of tile showing on each side of your coaster (how much you want showing is up to you, but you shouldn't have paper right to the edge of your tile).  This allows for a seamless mod podge application and prevents your paper from peeling off later.

step 2.  After you trace, take a ruler (or any straight edge - I just used a piece of paper) and trace a few millimeters INSIDE your original trace line.  Remember: you'll be using this as a template, so make sure leave just a little bit extra space to allow for the extra width of trace lines.

step 3.  Trace your template onto the rest of your scrapbook paper, cut them out, and set them aside.

step 4.  Take two or three of your tiles and apply an even, thin-ish layer of mod podge onto the tile.  I recommend doing two or three tiles at a time  

Side Note:  In my ignorance, I somehow thought that if I just brushed mod podge on top of a piece of paper sitting on a tile, it would magically adhere.  After I did that, I sat there looking stupidly at the tile thinking, Is that it? Why doesn't that look right?  I did some research and figured out you need to apply mod podge first.  Derp deh derp.

step 5.  After you've applied your thin-ish layer of mod podge to the tile, apply your scrapbook paper, squaring it with the tile and pressing around the paper (edges especially) to assure adherence.

step 6.  Once your paper is set, apply a thin-ish coat of mod podge on top of the paper.  Make sure the coat application is even and goes all the way to the edges of the tile.

step 7.  Now, you just need to apply more coats of mod podge.  The bottle directions said apply five coats, letting each coat completely dry (takes about 20 minutes) before applying the next.  I just followed the directions.

However,  the bottle directions also said something about wet sanding in between each coat.  I didn't know what that meant, soooo I just didn't do it.

step 8.  After you've applied all five coats and let them dry, you are now ready to apply the acrylic sealer.  Make sure you follow the direction on the can, and do this in a well-ventilated area.  I wore a bandana around my face because I am a total gangsta.

I moved my operation outside to avoid inhaling sealant.
Also, it was GORGEOUS out today.

After sealant was applied.  Not much of a difference other than being
slightly shinier and stinkier.

 step 9.  Make sure to let your coasters dry in a cooler place than outside in the direct sunlight.  While they are drying, cut out the felt that you will be sticking to the bottom of your coasters.

Note:  If you're smarter than me, you'll see that using circles for felt pads is a ridiculous idea.  They were tedious to trace and tedious to cut out.  Not to mention, it wasted felt.  Be brilliant - cut out squares.

step 10.  Stick your felt pads in each corner of your coaster, as close to the edges as you can without the felt pad being seen.

step 11.  Enjoy your beautiful new coasters!  Or, in case of the utter lack of a coffee table, give them as a gift to friends who are cooler than you because they actually own a coffee table.

If you have read any of my other posts, sometimes I don't think of something brilliant (or obvious) about what I'm making until after the fact.  If you were reading this and at some point thought, "Oh, honey, you're doing that the hardest way possible," please feel free to leave comments, suggestions, and tips!  I'm always looking to improve my crafty adventures.

So, until next time...!

Summer.  I don't think I have ever been more thankful for summer.  E.V.E.R.

"Why?" you might ask.  "What's so amazing about summer?"  

Besides that being the stupidest question in the world (because there is such a thing as a stupid question), summer is a teacher's sacred time to piece back together their sanity after having spent 9 months being a mentor, a counselor, a parent, an advocate, a professional - a teacher.

As I entered teaching, I keenly felt an enormous responsibility for my students.  My job was (and is) to prepare them to be successful in "the real world."  What I taught in class, how I interacted with them, counseled them, could potentially impact them forever.  I'm not trying to be melodramatic.  Take a minute - really think about what teachers are charged with doing.  It's mind blowing.

And terrifying.

And thrilling.

And I am so stoked to be a teacher.

Now, I did not have a magical first year.  I survived my first year.  But, somewhere between agonizing self-doubt, drinking eight cups of coffee a day to stay functional, and smiling and nodding while feeling occasionally (okay, more than occasionally) clueless, I fell hopelessly in love with teaching.  Maybe it was my students (they're AWESOME), maybe it was the little victories, or maybe it's just the fact that the summer haze casts a golden glow on my memories from this past year.  I'm not so naive to think that everything will be easy from here on out.  But it will be worth it, because I am going to be an awesome teacher.

So, how does one become the world's greatest teacher?

Pinterest.  Obviously.

Seriously, though - Pinterest is an awesome resource for teachers.  There are many practical (and impractical) ideas for projects, classroom set-up, common core resources, and, of course, teacher humor.  I've used Pinterest to print classroom posters, find fun graphics for hand-outs, and to brainstorm new, exciting ways to present topics.

So, today, I give you:  The Sharpie Mug.  Every teacher (also, everyONE) needs a fun, personalized caffeine vessel.  Enjoy the tutorial!

Heheh.  Get it?

Sharpie Mug Tutorial

A glossy mug.  Exactly what I tell
you NOT to use.  However, bold
colored Sharpies are a must.

So, here we go!

Materials:

1.  White mug:  This is tricky.  If you use a mug that has a high-gloss finish, regular Sharpies, ceramic paint, and oil-based Sharpies will. not. work.  At least, not well.  The high gloss pretty much acts like a whiteboard.  For optimal results, you need a mug that has a matte glaze.  My theory?  The matte finish is more porous, so will absorb the Sharpie/paint more effectively.

2.  Sharpies (or ceramic paint pen or oil-based Sharpies).

Oil-based Sharpie; Elmer's Painters

3.  Oven.

Procedure/Results:

1.  Make sure you wash your mug to rinse off dirt, oils, etc.  The ink/paint won't adhere well to a dirty or oily surface.

2.  Choose your drawing utensil (regular Sharpie, oil-based Sharpie, ceramic paint pen) and draw your lovely, witty, awe-inspiring design.  Since words are more my thing, I stuck to some of my favorite sayings.

3.  Let your mug sit for 24 hours.  This will help the ink dry and "settle" into your mug.

4.  After drawing on your design and letting your mug sit for 24 hours, put your mug in your oven at 400 F (I upped the temp from other tutorials) for 40 minutes (I also upped the time).  DO NOT
PREHEAT YOUR OVEN.  I'm not sure why I capitalized that, but apparently it's important, mainly because it's what I did.

5.  After baking for 40 minutes, turn off the heat and let the mugs cool down in the oven.

6.  After the mugs sufficiently cooled, I did a "water" test, to see if it worked.  Mainly, I just ran water over the decorated area and then rubbed the mug vigorously to make sure that the design would stay.  For science's sake, I also scratched several of my designs with my fingernails to test the durability of the design.  The only mug that withstood THAT test was the regular Sharpie mug with the matte finish.

Conclusion:
Okay, since this was a science experiment (kind of), here are my conclusions:

• Glossy mugs aren't awesome for this project.  The only thing that kind of worked on the glossy mug was the ceramic paint, and it still scratched off.  I would like to further this experiment by using some food-safe clear-coat sealer...I know it has to exist somewhere.
• Matte-finish mugs are ideal and seem to hold the Sharpie ink better.  I would use regular Sharpie markers, as they are odor-free while "cooking," have more color options, and are less cumbersome to use.  Oil-based Sharpies and ceramic paint pens are pretty much the same thing.  They don't seem to work quite as well,  and they smell AWFUL while your mug bakes.
• After you have decorated a mug, don't expect everything to be peachy when you throw it in your dishwasher. Treat it like you would any other hand-decorated finery - gently hand wash!

Awesome Dr. Who poem:  "In bed above we lie asleep/ While greater love lies further deep/ This dream must end/ This world must know/ We all depend on the beast below."

Thanks for playing!  If you have any suggestions for me to try (because I'm going to continue to work out the kinks in this), let me know!  Happy decorating!

It's my birthday, I can craft if I want to.

Yup, it really is my birthday.  Since everyone I love is either sleeping, working, or 200+ miles away, I've pretty much had the day to myself.  Boring, you say?  Not at all.  You see, I'm what you call an introvert.  While enjoying the company of others, my favorite way to spend my down time is either by myself (or Aaron) with a good book or DIY project.

So, what have I chosen to do with all this time to myself (besides eat half a bag of my favorite chips - salt and vinegar.  Don't judge me, it's my birthday)?  Well, there have been a couple of projects that I've wanted to try, so I did both of them.  I'll save the other one for a later date, but here's today's:

Bleach Pattern T-shirts

I've had this old t-shirt that actually already has a couple small bleach spots - not too bad, but enough to keep me from wearing it.  So I figured, hey, why not bleach it some more?  There are a couple of ways you can do this.  I chose to use a stencil I already had to form the pattern on the shirt, and just dabbed on the bleach with a sponge brush.  You can also use (and I really want to try this) a bleach pen, so you can literally draw your own designs on to your shirt...I KNOW you just got excited about that.

Materials:

1. Bleach.  Any old brand will do.
2. T-shirt.  Any old t-shirt will do.  Please excuse the cat hair on mine - she really is a menace sometimes.
3. Stencil.  Any old stencil will do.
4. Cardboard, newspaper, or cutting board. Any old...eh, whatever. I opted for the less conventional cutting board to slip underneath the shirt to keep the bleach from bleeding through to the back.

• Place your stencil where you'd like the design to be on your t-shirt.  My stencil was moving around a bit, so I taped it down.  
• Mix your water and bleach solution.  I used about 4 tablespoons of bleach and 1.5 cups of water.

• Using the sponge brush, conservatively dab the bleach solution on to your t-shirt.  I say CONSERVATIVELY because the bleach will bleed, and you want a DESIGN, not a giant bleach blob...unless, of course, you ARE going for a giant bleach blob.  Then, by all means, blob away.

• See? You can see the color change right away!  Spiffy.

• Dangerously nearing "blob" status...but, not too bad!

• I got the bleaching fever...probably also known as bleach fumes...so I decided to do one more design...

• I was even MORE conservative with the bleach this time around, and, thus, you can see more of the pattern.

 At this point, I decided to call it quits.  The shirt didn't turn out too badly - I still the think the bleach pen idea is a waaaaay better option, but this wasn't bad for improvisation.

In other news, my magnificent hubby, who finally awoke from his deep, day-time slumber, went to go get me dinner (so I could sit on our patio reading while a thunderstorm rolled in - fave!), flowers, THE BEST ROOT BEER EVER (don't judge me, it's my birthday), and Peanut M&Ms (don't judge me, it's my birthday).  Overall, a successful birthDAY.  Looking forward to my birthday WEEK....!

Chalkboard Paint.

Oh geez.  The possibilities!  I'm not going to lie, after I bought a bottle of chalkboard paint, I walked around my apartment, bottle in hand, scheming which items I could legitimately turn into chalkboards.  I stood in front of my bathroom mirror, wishing against things like security deposits, just so I'd be able to paint half of the mirror with chalkboard paint (because that could be totally useful and cool...right?).

Luckily I came to my senses before something serious happened.....like before I started painting my face or my cat or something else catastrophic.  In any case, I settled for painting a mug that I picked up at Goodwill for $.50.   That way, if I decided it didn't work out well, it was only a $.50 mug that got ruined and not.....my bathroom mirror or my face.


Materials you're going to need:

Paint palette, paintbrush, cheap mug, Martha Stewart Crafts Chalkboard paint in black.

Materials with a cat option added.

1. Chalkboard Paint.  There are a couple of options that you've got here.  At Michael's, there were two main types of chalkboard paint:  spray paint or conventional paint, both in black or green.  I chose Martha Stewart conventional chalkboard paint simply because it was specifically a multi-surface paint.  I plan on doing some experimenting with the other varieties, which, of course, I will post about.
2. Mug.  Cheap mug from Goodwill.  
3. Soft paint brush.  Make sure this brush is SOFT.  I didn't really think about this as I was doing this project (big surprise there), but a stiffer bristled brush will not evenly coat the paint.  Go for a water color brush, or perhaps a sponge brush.
4. Painter's tape.  I thought regular masking tape would work just as well.  False.  Painters tape will leave a cleaner edge.  The masking tape was kind of a mess...you'll see.

 







Okay, got all that?  Here's what you do:

• Starting with a clean, dry mug, tape off the areas of the mug you don't want paint on.  You can paint part of the mug or the whole thing.  I opted for a stripe around the middle.  If you choose to paint the entire mug, make sure you leave room at the top to put your mouth on - I really don't think this paint is food safe.  And, for heaven's sake, do a better job than me when you're taping up your mug.  This looks like I did it blind folded. 
• Once you've got your mug taped, start painting!  Apply the paint in thin, even coats, allowing it to dry after each coat.  

• After your last coat of paint, carefully peel off the painter's tape.  If you look closely at the mug, you can see ridges in the paint because I didn't use a soft paintbrush.  Also, the edges aren't exactly uniform and even.  Stop being a perfectionist, you say?  Well, setting perfectionism aside, if your edges aren't clean, it's more likely the paint will chip.  Aaaand, ridges in the chalkboard part make the mug harder to write on.  Just sayin'. 

• Before you write on the mug, you're supposed to "season" it with chalk?  I'm not really sure what that does, exactly, but that's what the directions on the paint bottle said to do, so that's what I did.

• Yay!  A chalkboard mug!  

Considerations and Disclaimers:

Okay, so, look.  This paint?  It's cool, but it's probably not food safe, dishwasher safe, etc, etc.  Don't let your child, dog, cat, lizard, whatever - don't let them lick this mug or anything.  Apparently there is a water-based, nontoxic variety of chalkboard paint that is probably food safe (and is also microwave and dishwasher safe), I was just too lazy and impatient to order it online.  I fully plan on using this mug like normal, but I'm stupid like that sometimes.  Click here for more info about the nontoxic variety of paint, as well as where I got this sweet project idea. 


Excited as I am about this stuff?  Click here for other projects that you could do with chalkboard paint (and I probably will, eventually).  If nothing else, I have an old frame that I plan on repurposing into a chalkboard that I'll post about.  But the link provides some very cool, very brave ideas for turning stuff into chalkboards.


Did this inspire you to chalkboard it up?  Do you have something you'd like to turn into a chalkboard?  Let me know what you did (or are planning to do)!


Happy painting!

Unforseen Circumstances.

To all three of my faithful readers out there, I'm so sorry about the lack of project postings this week.  I've been stranded in my hometown because my car broke down (typical).  It's been a long, LONG week, fully worthy of consideration for day-time soap opera material.  BUT.  I'm a firm believer in mostly positive thinking, and finding the humor in any given situation.  Why cry when you can laugh?  AMIRIGHT?

So, in a week full of "do withouts," here's what I've learned:

1. I love my husband very much, and miss even his most annoying antics more than I ever thought I would.
2. My family is generous, supportive, sympathetic, and they LOVE me.  Even though this visit was unplanned and has been inconvenient, it's also been really great getting to hang out with them.  I've gone to church with them, had a wonderful Fourth of July get-together with their pastor and his awesome family, floated down a river on obnoxiously colored inflatables with my mom, gone shopping, cooked, and have done menial housechores (including landscaping on the HOTTEST DAY OF THE YEAR - but that only lasted about 20 minutes before we dropped the shovels and broke out the swimsuits and the inflatables).  All of these things, down to the menial housechores, have been a great way to spend time with the people I care about deeply - time that we don't often get to share with each other.
3. Sometimes trusting that things are going to work out is really hard to do, and sometimes things just straight up don't work.  Again, instead of crying about it (well, maybe I cried just a little), I've learned to take in a deep breath through the nose, exhale sharply, shake it off, and go, "Okay, that sucks.  But how do we move forward from here?" 
4. I have a lot of junk - some of which I miss right now, some of which I don't.  But, I'm thankful, after having limited resources this week, for what I've got.  Cliche?  You bet your sweet bippy it is - but it's sincere.

Okay, that was all the emotional stuff.  Here's the funny stuff I learned this week:

1. My suspicions have been confirmed:  my cat Cuddles is actually an assassin.
2. I'm about 85% sure I have a disorder called "misophonia."  So does Kelly Ripa.  Google it.
3. "Teste Toss" is NOT a widely-approved name for the yard game "ladder ball."
4. I can't sit quietly for more than 10 minutes.  This is an interesting development.  In fact, since I started composing this post, I've broken into song at least four times - "Step by Step" by New Kids On the Block, "Don't Stop Believing" by Journey, "Thriller" by Michael Jackson, and "A Whole New World" from Aladdin.  That's right.  Aladdin.  
5. Extreme heat makes me want to be outside MORE.  What?!

And the week's not even over yet!  I have an interview tomorrow, so that should make for some good stories too...hopefully like "I-totally-rocked-that-interview" stories and not "I-am-a-complete-and-utter-fool" stories.

So, as long as the risk that I took with my car plays out to my advantage, I should be home by Saturday, and I'll be back to my normal craftiness. 

Maybe I'll even have a job.

Get excited, AKF.